I know I haven't written in a while, but that's because I got sucked in to the holidays. Tyler and I had an awesome Christmas, which involved us exchanging gifts on the twelve days leading up to December 25. The rule was to give one thing each day, but neither of us could help ourselves. ANYWAY, it's been too long, so I thought I'd write about something kind of heavy.
Tyler thinks I'm physically attractive.
Now, I actually just wrote "Tyler thinks I'm beautiful", but deleted it. I know he does, but that statement implies all sorts of things about my heart and soul and that is not what I'm talking about. I am talking about how he views my body, face, etc.
Look, I've never thought I was ugly. I've also thought if I was the only woman left on earth, the majority of men wouldn't complain, as long as I really was the only woman left on earth. If say, your Natalie Portman or Blake Lively popped out of a bomb shelter, I would no longer be hot stuff. Yes, as long as I wasn't standing next to anyone else, I was a solid 7.75, or with the right makeup and lighting, an 8.
When I met Tyler, all that changed. He has told me, pretty much every day since we began dating that I am beautiful. Physically beautiful. My eyes, my lips, my cheekbones. That stuff. Any woman who tells you that she doesn't like being told she's beautiful is lying. So yes, I have never tired nor will I ever tire from hearing that every day. Did I believe Tyler right away though? Ho, ho, ho...definitely not! I just thought he was being nice, that perhaps he was just saying the thing all women want to hear to get in my good graces. Well, Tyler never says anything he doesn't mean, which I eventually learned. And with the repeated compliments combined with the way he stares at me sometimes...I believe him now.
But that's just my face! What about my body? Well...again, I'm fine until Gisele Bundchen or Kim Kardashian crawls out of the bomb shelter. I'm short, so I've always thought my legs were stubby and chubby. I carry most of my weight there and in my stomach, which growing up in the era of Britney Spears and the midriff baring tops did nothing for my self-esteem. I have an ample bosom, but my butt (I thought) was not sufficient enough thanks to Sir Mix-a-Lot and J. Lo. Untoned, pale, and scattered with cellulite. It could be worse, surely, but it could be better too.
Enter Tyler. A bit after we began dating, he saw my body. I'll never forget the look on his face when he did either. Never. I truly felt sexy. With his compliments and words of reassurance and his, well, constant desire for me, I believe him on this front as well.
So am I the most sexy and beautiful woman in the world? I am to Tyler and that's all that matters to me.
Saturday, January 9, 2016
Thursday, December 10, 2015
The Awesomeness of Yesterday
As fun as it is to write about all of Tyler's amazing traits, I want to write about yesterday. Yesterday is the embodiment of everything I love about him and our life together.
I slept on and off during the night and woke up Miss Crankypants. Tyler was very kind and sweet (all the while laughing at my crankiness) as he encouraged me to get up and go to work. Even though I was whining deliriously, Tyler found me to be cute and entertaining. I am so grateful he thinks this way about me. Note: I was not being a bitch to him, but a bitch nonetheless.
Work is work and that part of my day sucked especially since I was functioning on a couple hours of sleep. I was glad when it was over and came right over to Tyler's place. There I helped Tyler move a new loveseat into his living room. Our new loveseat...for the home we will eventually share together. (Oh my, that statement just gave me chills!)
Next we went to Winco to get stuff for dinner which consisted of deep fried pickles covered in Cheeto dust--(For real, pickles and Cheetos are a bitchin' combination. Tyler thought I was crazy until he tried it. He's a changed man now. You should try it too.)--and Buffalo wings, which is My Favorite Food Ever. Tyler mastered it early on in our relationship and they are the best wings I've ever had.
After Winco (It's always a thrill to hold Tyler's hand in public, by the way. I will never tire of it.) we came back home. While I laid my lazy ass on the new loveseat and watched House Hunters: International, Tyler made dinner. I offered to help and did a little, but Tyler insisted that I relax. What wonderful, wonderful man. I gorged on the wings like it was a contest and Tyler still thought I was cute even though I was doing my best Homer Simpson impression.
After dinner came dessert, if you know what I mean. I was feeling rather amorous due to all of Tyler's loving behavior and...well, he is one sexy motherfucker. So I proceeded to show him how much I love him and he showed me right back. Earth shattering, body quaking, breathless heaven.
By then, I was really exhausted, but Tyler wasn't finished being an amazing boyfriend. Since I had to get up the next morning and he didn't, I was going to try to go sleep at a normal hour. Tyler gave me an ankle massage while I watched Marriage Boot Camp: Bridezillas. Oh my God. Look at that statement. Yikes. Yikes. Ooof, I feel guilty. (I have a problem with bad TV.) Resolution: No more exposing Tyler to shitty reality TV. After a while, Tyler kissed me good night and went to play video games.
But it doesn't end there! Apparently, I was having a nightmare and Tyler came to wake me up. I don't remember having one, so it was a nice surprise waking up to his beautiful face. THEN I had to gall to ask him to bring me water which he did. Of course. Because he's the most amazing man in the world. And he's mine! I am one damn hell ass lucky woman.
People, that was just December 9. Not my birthday, not Valentine's Day, not our anniversary. An unimportant day to the naked eye. Why would December 9 be special? Because I got to be with Tyler, that's why. And I look forward to each and every day I spend with him because just being with him makes life special.
I slept on and off during the night and woke up Miss Crankypants. Tyler was very kind and sweet (all the while laughing at my crankiness) as he encouraged me to get up and go to work. Even though I was whining deliriously, Tyler found me to be cute and entertaining. I am so grateful he thinks this way about me. Note: I was not being a bitch to him, but a bitch nonetheless.
Work is work and that part of my day sucked especially since I was functioning on a couple hours of sleep. I was glad when it was over and came right over to Tyler's place. There I helped Tyler move a new loveseat into his living room. Our new loveseat...for the home we will eventually share together. (Oh my, that statement just gave me chills!)
Next we went to Winco to get stuff for dinner which consisted of deep fried pickles covered in Cheeto dust--(For real, pickles and Cheetos are a bitchin' combination. Tyler thought I was crazy until he tried it. He's a changed man now. You should try it too.)--and Buffalo wings, which is My Favorite Food Ever. Tyler mastered it early on in our relationship and they are the best wings I've ever had.
After Winco (It's always a thrill to hold Tyler's hand in public, by the way. I will never tire of it.) we came back home. While I laid my lazy ass on the new loveseat and watched House Hunters: International, Tyler made dinner. I offered to help and did a little, but Tyler insisted that I relax. What wonderful, wonderful man. I gorged on the wings like it was a contest and Tyler still thought I was cute even though I was doing my best Homer Simpson impression.
After dinner came dessert, if you know what I mean. I was feeling rather amorous due to all of Tyler's loving behavior and...well, he is one sexy motherfucker. So I proceeded to show him how much I love him and he showed me right back. Earth shattering, body quaking, breathless heaven.
By then, I was really exhausted, but Tyler wasn't finished being an amazing boyfriend. Since I had to get up the next morning and he didn't, I was going to try to go sleep at a normal hour. Tyler gave me an ankle massage while I watched Marriage Boot Camp: Bridezillas. Oh my God. Look at that statement. Yikes. Yikes. Ooof, I feel guilty. (I have a problem with bad TV.) Resolution: No more exposing Tyler to shitty reality TV. After a while, Tyler kissed me good night and went to play video games.
But it doesn't end there! Apparently, I was having a nightmare and Tyler came to wake me up. I don't remember having one, so it was a nice surprise waking up to his beautiful face. THEN I had to gall to ask him to bring me water which he did. Of course. Because he's the most amazing man in the world. And he's mine! I am one damn hell ass lucky woman.
People, that was just December 9. Not my birthday, not Valentine's Day, not our anniversary. An unimportant day to the naked eye. Why would December 9 be special? Because I got to be with Tyler, that's why. And I look forward to each and every day I spend with him because just being with him makes life special.
Saturday, November 21, 2015
Reason I Love Tyler #8
Lately I've been writing about the more "serious" reasons that I love Tyler because, you know, as endearing as I find his unzipped fly, he has many, many other good and more important qualities that deserve posts. Worry not, dear reader, I will still post about those adorable quirks in the coming months, but for now, I shall focus on the things that truly matter.
Tyler listens to the unimportant stuff.
Hello. My name is Jordyn and I am a sugar addict. Since I was a wee bairn I have gobbled up cookies and candy and cake and pie and ice cream and all the delicious things we are not supposed to eat without much thought to my health. Oh sure, when I started to feel like a heifer, I would cut back but it wouldn't be long before my surrender to Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
Around Halloween this year, I was feeling like that heifer again. (Tyler didn't see it. Rest assured that will be a post all on its own.) So I decided to not eat sugar until Thanksgiving. All right. Groovy. I can do this. Yes. Yes, I can. But not without talking Tyler's ear off. Oh, my wonderful, wonderful man. Do you know what he's had to endure? Endless, endless chatter about my cravings. Statistics. Calorie content. Let's watch documentaries about obesity! I want Twizzlers. I want Snickers. Gimme, gimme, gimme!
If I could just shut up, that would be one thing. But I can't shut up. I hear myself being annoying, and I still can't stop it. Here's the point: Tyler probably could give a rat's ass that I want to eat an entire tub of Cool Whip, but if I were to say it, he would laugh. I doubt he wants to hear about it any of it, but since it's important to me, it's important to him. He is interested in what I have to say even when he is isn't. And never once has he said something in the vein of "Hey, can we maybe not talk about how much you want to devour a box of doughnuts tonight?" Tyler just listens, nods, and smiles.
Have I mentioned how lucky I am?
(Don't worry, there will be a "Tyler listens to the important stuff" post!)
Tyler listens to the unimportant stuff.
Hello. My name is Jordyn and I am a sugar addict. Since I was a wee bairn I have gobbled up cookies and candy and cake and pie and ice cream and all the delicious things we are not supposed to eat without much thought to my health. Oh sure, when I started to feel like a heifer, I would cut back but it wouldn't be long before my surrender to Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
Around Halloween this year, I was feeling like that heifer again. (Tyler didn't see it. Rest assured that will be a post all on its own.) So I decided to not eat sugar until Thanksgiving. All right. Groovy. I can do this. Yes. Yes, I can. But not without talking Tyler's ear off. Oh, my wonderful, wonderful man. Do you know what he's had to endure? Endless, endless chatter about my cravings. Statistics. Calorie content. Let's watch documentaries about obesity! I want Twizzlers. I want Snickers. Gimme, gimme, gimme!
If I could just shut up, that would be one thing. But I can't shut up. I hear myself being annoying, and I still can't stop it. Here's the point: Tyler probably could give a rat's ass that I want to eat an entire tub of Cool Whip, but if I were to say it, he would laugh. I doubt he wants to hear about it any of it, but since it's important to me, it's important to him. He is interested in what I have to say even when he is isn't. And never once has he said something in the vein of "Hey, can we maybe not talk about how much you want to devour a box of doughnuts tonight?" Tyler just listens, nods, and smiles.
Have I mentioned how lucky I am?
(Don't worry, there will be a "Tyler listens to the important stuff" post!)
Friday, November 20, 2015
Reason I Love Tyler #44
I have been meaning to do a post on this one for a while. Every time it happens, I think to myself: "Why haven't I posted about this yet??" It's not as important as last week's (what is?), but it still means a lot to me.
Tyler visits me on my lunch break. Often.
Although Tyler and I live about five minutes apart, he works far, far away (about a 40 minute drive). We also work different schedules, with our weekends falling on non-coinciding days. This isn't ideal, but we have and will continue to make it work. Anyway, while I've come down to Lewiston to visit Tyler at work a few times, he consistently visits me on my thirty minute lunch break. Now, I know this might not seem like a big deal; all he has is a five minute drive. Whoop-de-do. But, he makes it a priority to come hang out with me. Depending on my schedule, that might mean him waking up before he's ready to be awake. Or it might mean him putting a halt to his precious leisure time. I know he doesn't see this as burdensome, and that is also I why I love him. Seeing Tyler in the middle of my work day doesn't make it seem so long. Then I know it's only a few hours until I can really be with him.
Tyler visits me on my lunch break. Often.
Although Tyler and I live about five minutes apart, he works far, far away (about a 40 minute drive). We also work different schedules, with our weekends falling on non-coinciding days. This isn't ideal, but we have and will continue to make it work. Anyway, while I've come down to Lewiston to visit Tyler at work a few times, he consistently visits me on my thirty minute lunch break. Now, I know this might not seem like a big deal; all he has is a five minute drive. Whoop-de-do. But, he makes it a priority to come hang out with me. Depending on my schedule, that might mean him waking up before he's ready to be awake. Or it might mean him putting a halt to his precious leisure time. I know he doesn't see this as burdensome, and that is also I why I love him. Seeing Tyler in the middle of my work day doesn't make it seem so long. Then I know it's only a few hours until I can really be with him.
Saturday, November 14, 2015
Reason I Love Tyler #1
It's time to get serious, y'all. So far on this little blog of mine, I've kept it light, listing off the doofy yet entirely adorable things Tyler does that make me love him. I'm a firm believer in the little things. But you can't love a person just because of their quirks. There are much more important things. Such as Honesty, Integrity, Loyalty...all those biggies. Tyler possesses all these, and yet I'm not going to talk about those yet. I'm going to focus on something spectacularly selfish:
Tyler loves me for me.
Duh, you say. This is how it's supposed to be, you say. Well you are right. The trick is, I never ever thought I would find anyone who would love me for me. Look, we all have our idiosyncrasies and mannerisms, but mine are weird. Unsexy. Head-scratching. Rest assured that if I were old and rich I would be considered eccentric. Despite all my good qualities (say, I won't pelt your car with eggs if you dump me), I still felt unworthy of love. Oh, I thought I was an entertaining conversationalist, but no one you would want to spend seven days a week with, no one you'd want to make out with after such entertaining conversations. Yes, sadly, this is how I thought until I met Tyler.
Love isn't so blind that Tyler doesn't see my weirdness. He sees It, yes indeed. But he doesn't just see It and ignore It, he likes It. Nay, he loves It. Because It is me. He embraces my weirdness, encourages it. And it feels wonderful. I can be myself. I can dance around, make my loud blasting noises that resemble a laugh, jabber on and on about my skincare routine or the British monarchy. Even if these subjects don't interest him (often), he at least likes the way I do it. Bless him.
And that's the goal, isn't it? We all want someone who loves us for us. Someone we can entirely be ourselves around and not only that, someone who wants us to be ourselves, someone who gets turned on by us being ourselves. It's fantastic. It's the whole point. I'm lucky. So damn lucky.
Tyler loves me for me.
Duh, you say. This is how it's supposed to be, you say. Well you are right. The trick is, I never ever thought I would find anyone who would love me for me. Look, we all have our idiosyncrasies and mannerisms, but mine are weird. Unsexy. Head-scratching. Rest assured that if I were old and rich I would be considered eccentric. Despite all my good qualities (say, I won't pelt your car with eggs if you dump me), I still felt unworthy of love. Oh, I thought I was an entertaining conversationalist, but no one you would want to spend seven days a week with, no one you'd want to make out with after such entertaining conversations. Yes, sadly, this is how I thought until I met Tyler.
Love isn't so blind that Tyler doesn't see my weirdness. He sees It, yes indeed. But he doesn't just see It and ignore It, he likes It. Nay, he loves It. Because It is me. He embraces my weirdness, encourages it. And it feels wonderful. I can be myself. I can dance around, make my loud blasting noises that resemble a laugh, jabber on and on about my skincare routine or the British monarchy. Even if these subjects don't interest him (often), he at least likes the way I do it. Bless him.
And that's the goal, isn't it? We all want someone who loves us for us. Someone we can entirely be ourselves around and not only that, someone who wants us to be ourselves, someone who gets turned on by us being ourselves. It's fantastic. It's the whole point. I'm lucky. So damn lucky.
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
"Our House"
Several years ago, I wrote a shitty song and published it on the internet. It was a mistake. I was proud of it despite its vile subject matter. That was also a mistake. (But hey, you can use the word “mistake” to describe most of my life.) Since then I have tried to ignore this horrid song to no avail. The only thing I can do to remedy—excuse me, attempt to remedy—the damage caused by this song is to write another one that comes from the heart and is inspired by someone truly worthy and events that truly happened. Now look, I’m not a songwriter, but I tried my best. I did this in just under three hours, so be kind.
Tyler, this is yours. Merry Christmas.
Written to the tune of “Wildest Dreams” by Taylor Swift.
(I really, really can’t write music.)
Our House
Will you take a walk with me
Down the gravel road
Where no one else can see
There’s a place I wanna take you to
We can be alone
Somewhere just for me and you
Empty house
On a hill
Come with me
I know you will
Through the dark
And the weeds
You’re everything I need
Kiss me, sweetly, everywhere
Fill my soul with your love
You’re everything I’ve dreamed of, dear
Take me and make me all yours
You’re the one I live for
Oh baby, how we’ve made this
Our house now
It’s our house now
I’ve felt nothing like this before
Your touch makes me so weak
There’s nothing I want more
Tasting every inch of your flesh
I’ll take you to heaven
I’m gonna leave you breathless
Empty house
On a hill
Return with me
I know you will
I’ll take your hand,
Follow your lead,
You’re all I’ll ever need
Kiss me, deeply, everywhere
Lay me on the wood floor
Cover me with your warmth, dear
Your hands burning my skin
Gonna take you all in
Oh baby, you can’t deny this is
Our house now
It’s our house now
Looking in your brown eyes
Feeling like I could fly
So hold me tight
My hands in your dark hair
Feeling this love so rare
Now I’ve seen the light
Looking in your brown eyes
Feeling like I could fly
Hold me tight
My hands in your dark hair
Feeling this love so rare
Now I’ve seen the light
Kiss me, sweetly, everywhere
Fill my soul with your love
You’re everything I’ve dreamed of, dear
Take me and make me all yours
You’re the one I live for
The one I feel in my core
Kiss me, deeply, everywhere
Lay me on the wood floor
Cover me with your warmth, dear
Your hands burning my skin
Gonna take you all in
Oh baby, can’t deny this is
Our house now
It’s our house now
Baby let’s take a walk to
Our house
It’s our house now
Tyler, this is yours. Merry Christmas.
Written to the tune of “Wildest Dreams” by Taylor Swift.
(I really, really can’t write music.)
Our House
Will you take a walk with me
Down the gravel road
Where no one else can see
There’s a place I wanna take you to
We can be alone
Somewhere just for me and you
Empty house
On a hill
Come with me
I know you will
Through the dark
And the weeds
You’re everything I need
Kiss me, sweetly, everywhere
Fill my soul with your love
You’re everything I’ve dreamed of, dear
Take me and make me all yours
You’re the one I live for
Oh baby, how we’ve made this
Our house now
It’s our house now
I’ve felt nothing like this before
Your touch makes me so weak
There’s nothing I want more
Tasting every inch of your flesh
I’ll take you to heaven
I’m gonna leave you breathless
Empty house
On a hill
Return with me
I know you will
I’ll take your hand,
Follow your lead,
You’re all I’ll ever need
Kiss me, deeply, everywhere
Lay me on the wood floor
Cover me with your warmth, dear
Your hands burning my skin
Gonna take you all in
Oh baby, you can’t deny this is
Our house now
It’s our house now
Looking in your brown eyes
Feeling like I could fly
So hold me tight
My hands in your dark hair
Feeling this love so rare
Now I’ve seen the light
Looking in your brown eyes
Feeling like I could fly
Hold me tight
My hands in your dark hair
Feeling this love so rare
Now I’ve seen the light
Kiss me, sweetly, everywhere
Fill my soul with your love
You’re everything I’ve dreamed of, dear
Take me and make me all yours
You’re the one I live for
The one I feel in my core
Kiss me, deeply, everywhere
Lay me on the wood floor
Cover me with your warmth, dear
Your hands burning my skin
Gonna take you all in
Oh baby, can’t deny this is
Our house now
It’s our house now
Baby let’s take a walk to
Our house
It’s our house now
Sunday, October 11, 2015
Reason I Love Tyler #83
Tyler has a very specific way of opening bags of chips/candy/what-have-you.
Instead of just ripping all willy-nilly, leaving the bag with a gaping, jagged opening, he tears a perfect 90 degree angle into the corner of whichever foodstuff bag he desires. Needless to say, I open no bags in case I fumble this ancient dance of man v. food. The quirks...yes, the quirks....all the little pieces that add up to the man I love.
Instead of just ripping all willy-nilly, leaving the bag with a gaping, jagged opening, he tears a perfect 90 degree angle into the corner of whichever foodstuff bag he desires. Needless to say, I open no bags in case I fumble this ancient dance of man v. food. The quirks...yes, the quirks....all the little pieces that add up to the man I love.
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