30 Day Song Challenge REDUX -- Day 2

Day 2 -- A Song You HATE

"F♥ck Buddies" -- Jordyn Auvil, 2012

This was always going to be the song I HATE.

To bring you up to speed, this is from a post from last November:

Several years ago, I wrote a shitty song and published it on the internet. It was a mistake. I was proud of it despite its vile subject matter. That was also a mistake. (But hey, you can use the word “mistake” to describe most of my life.) Since then I have tried to ignore this horrid song to no avail. The only thing I can do to remedy—excuse me, attempt to remedy—the damage caused by this song is to write another one that comes from the heart and is inspired by someone truly worthy and events that truly happened.

"F♥ck Buddies" is the shitty song I'm talking about. (It's also the shittiest song of all time.)

The song came about because I didn't like the fact that Taylor Swift never wrote songs about sex. She sometimes made allusions, but it was usually derogatory. (Take this line from her song "Better Than Revenge" for example: "She's not a saint and she's not what you think, she's an actress/she's better known for the things that she does on the mattress".) It bugged me. She was in all these relationships and yet, she avoided the subject. Why? Did she not have sex? Was that it? It couldn't be because she liked her privacy because she was/is so open about everything else. (These were my feelings at the time. Now, I don't give a shit.) Anyway, I thought I could do what Taylor Swift did--write a detailed, catchy song--but do it like an "adult"--border it on crass, but make it ultimately fun and clever.

In the words of Wayne Campbell: "NOT!"

What I wrote was a justification of certain events along with twisted facts and borrowed details from other overtly sexual songs and the slew of rom-coms about casual sex that were recently released. Thinking about the lyrics turns my stomach and makes me cringe. It's just so horrible. I was seriously messed up at the time I wrote it and even more messed up when these events took place. (Or maybe it's the other way around. That can be debated.) These events weren't even worth writing about. I wanted my life to seem more glamorous and I idiotically thought rhyming would make it so. I had no idea what good sex even was then, so how could I dare write any song that even mentioned sex? (For the record, I didn't even have decent sex until Tyler, who is, of course, a dynamo in the sack). I was trying to be someone I wasn't. I was trying to be the opposite of who I was, who I thankfully am again.

Look, the song is awful, I hate it, and I wish I had never thought it up. I wish I had never spun my head around to think any of it was a good idea. I would have rather not brought it up at all, but that would be doing a disservice. Yes, there are other songs I HATE, but not one more than this one.

Okay. Now let's get that bad taste out of our mouths and take a look at this.