Dear Tyler #21

Dear Tyler,

Hello, my love! I know I've already done this a couple times, but I want to thank you for bringing me hot water for my bath. I'm glad I figured out how to make them last longer and therefore more effective. I also wanted to address when I asked if you were "mad at me." First, I fucking hate that question on principle. A friend of mine from high school use to ask if I was mad at her all the time and I wasn't until she started asking that inane question. It's annoying. Sorry. The reason I asked though...there have been times when I have thought everything was hunky-dory and then it turns out it wasn't. Annoying as it was, I wanted to address any conflict that may be occurring and squash it. I don't like conflict but if I must deal with it, I want to deal with it quickly and effectively. Like ripping off a Band-Aid.

Turns out there was no conflict (yay!) and I learned something! I get far more time relaxing at home than you and I do feel guilty about it. I have often wondered if you just want to be left alone when you get home, but then you don't say so. Perhaps you don't always want to be left alone and when you do, you're too polite to say so. I don't know. Instead of doing what I think you want me to do (bad, bad, bad), I do what I want to do which is sit next to you and talk about my day, your day, etc. If we came to an understanding that we talk for 20 minutes or whatever and then I go do something by myself, that would be A-Okay. Balance is a good thing. I don't need your constant attention and I want you to have interests and hobbies that have nothing to do with me.

Love,
Jordyn